Monday, October 19, 2009

A New Fun Way to Spend Bonus Time!

Print this out and do it or we're not friends, seriously.

Here at Bonus Time I think I try and do my best to provide you, the faithful reader, with fun activities and great ways to spend your Bonus Time on planet Earth. Whether it's picking out cool news stories to make you scratch your head, or maybe even inspire you a little, or flat out giving you advice on really cool shit, I try to do my best. Now I need the Bonus Time faithful to give back a little.

I want one of you to kill Jon Gosselin.

I know, I'm not even asking for that much, and after all of the great content I've provided you guys with, and promise to continue to provide you with, it's really the least I can ask.

I've made my thoughts on reality TV perfectly clear on this blog. If you watch it you are absolutely wasting your time. Hell, I'm guilty of it from time to time, but admit it, you're wasting your life every time you plop down to watch America's Next Top Mess or whatever. But this guy has somehow made the jump from reality TV to fucking front page news for like the past 3 months. And why, because he got divorced? My parents got divorced, bet yours did too, who the fuck cares? Oh is it just because he's an enormous dickhead? Then don't pay attention to him, maybe he'll go away.

Or maybe one of you offs him.

Just throwing it out there faithful, you'd be doing me and every one you know a serious favor. It's not even like those kids would be that bad off as it is anyway. I'm sure Disney is gonna put in an offer to buy them soon enough as it is. Hell you could auction those little fuckers off and take care of any debt in the world anyway.

Anywho, that asshole isn't news. Half the shit that's spoon fed to Americans through the media isn't news. Cut your eyes out and move to the moon. That's what I'm going to do. Thanks for hearing out my rant, and seriously someone just off this asshole. Thanks in advance.

Oh, and I'll give you a Bonus Time T-Shirt or something if you do. Not that those exist yet, but hey, it could happen.

Oh and Gosselin is officially a Bonus Time villain. If this article isn't enough evidence why, go read what I wrote about Octomom. Oh and his ex wife is a villain too because her hair sucks and she comes off like a stupid cunt.

4 comments:

RaychullTek said...

what if the feds show up at your house and arrest you for being a charles manson type?

Anonymous said...

Oh, puh-leeze! he's much better looking than charlie manson!

Phil said...

What if killing him just gets him more news coverage? It'll be like Michael Jackson all over again.

Stef said...

I think that a world sans Gosselin would be worth it, even if I had to put up with ridiculous media over saturation about his death for a month. You hardly hear anything about MJ anymore, so why would you believe an asshole like Gosselin would get that played out?

And thank you mysterious stranger, I like to think carving out my eyes would be far more fashionable than Manson's swastika on his forehead and you've helped me believe in that even more.