Friday, October 9, 2009

When Toadstools Ruled the Earth


OH HAI!

A bajillion years ago (250 million years ago) there was something called the Permian Mass Extinction in which 95% of sea life and 70% of land life on Earth died. Scientists believe the cause of the extinction, or "Great Dying," was constant volcanic eruptions coming from present day Siberia.

Now scientists are saying that not only did the greatest extinction the Earth has ever seen kill off most of the animal life on Earth, they're also suggesting now that this extinction also wiped out the world's forests.

Now scientists are saying that it was Fungus, and not trees that could have survived the mass extinction, and that fungus was the dominant vegetation on planet Earth for the next 4 million years.

This was predominantly because fungus could feed off of all the rotting wood. And a spike in fossils of such type of fungi is supporting the theory of so many forests being wiped out.

If you want to find out more on this, please click here. Otherwise I'm about to apply Bonus science to this.

Bonus Time scientists however believe that there is much more to this discovery. Could this possibly be ancient evidence of the Mushroom Kingdom?

Realistically, yes.

As cataloged by many top bonus science chronicles, the Mushroom Kingdom was a very real place. This article describes the dying off of most of the planet's species. Let's think back, how many different types of creatures ARE there in the Mushroom Kingdom? There's turtle people, evil mushrooms, and eventually some dinosaurs. And under the water there is even less diversity, a few squids and some fish, wow. In later games we get red fish and green fish, showing that things are starting to improve. But still the lack of eco diversity in the Mushroom Kingdom supports this theory.

It also explains Bowser's grudge with the Mushroom Kingdom. Wouldn't you fight back if most of your kind were wiped out? One day there are reptile men running all over the Earth, the next there's a bunch of Mushroom assholes running around with high pitched voices. Down and out you make a pact with some of the more asshole-ish Mushrooms (The Goombas) and there you go, time to take the world back.

Science + Bonus = Mario really happened. Aren't you glad it's Bonus Time? Now all you have to do is become a plumber, flush yourself down some kind of time toilet and you're set!

But be careful, something tells me that over the years history has been kinder to the Princess of the Mushroom Kingdom then they should have been. Princess Peach in the end might just be some kind of disgusting Mushroom hive, forcing the lesser mushroom people to do her bidding through her telekinetic hive network. Hell she might only even appear to a human to Mario to get him to do her evil bidding, maybe that's why he never gets with her...

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